As our population ages and we live longer and incur new challenges, life events, transitions, and losses may create family strife or disagreement. Mediators who specialize in Elder Mediation and Shared Family Decision Making are becoming more and more in demand. There has been a steady increasing spread of awareness of elder mediation services and its growing benefit in the arena of elder issues and disputes regarding senior citizens.
Elder Mediation is involved with all issues concerning older people, their family members or others in their lives. It is a cooperative process involving many parties and demands a mediator trained to deal with multiparty family issues and the unique needs and matters facing the senior population, their families and caregivers.
Elder Mediation helps seniors and their adult children and others resolve conflicts regarding:
Elder mediation provides an opportunity for older people to talk frankly with family members about values they hold and risks they are or are not willing to take. The older person can acknowledge his or her needs for assistance during mediation without fearing court intervention or breakdown of the family.
The mediation process can help improve, preserve, or even restore relationships. It can also provide a non-adversarial way of communication with which to approach future discussions.
When participants in elder mediation agree to work together compliance with the plan is higher than with other processes. Elder Mediation is here to stay.
In 2013 published an article on elder mediation
Planning for our end of life is not always easy for the planner or their family. No one likes to think about getting old or the possibility of losing the ability to care for or make decisions for oneself. Having the right tools in place can help alleviate the worry of the “what if?” Discussing wishes and planning with family members can give them clarity and help avoid additional stress and conflict if something happens.
Elder Law Attorneys understand family disagreements are hard and often painful. Elder law attorneys can facilitate the process because they know the law surrounding powers of attorney, guardianship and probate and the other legal issues facing the elderly and their families.
First, Identify values and priorities. When the following issues are addressed, (when we address the following issues) family fights can be reduced.:
When this planning doesn’t work, Mediation provides families with a neutral facilitator to guide them through a process for productive communication and decision making. Mediation can provide elder law lawyers with a resource to deal effectively with underlying issues that the legal system does not, e.g., intangible values, family history and dynamics, issues of autonomy and safety, interpersonal conflict, and quality-of-life choices.
Elder mediation helps resolve or prevent families from going to court after the death of the elder. In fact elder mediation is particularly well-suited to resolving trust and estate disputes
Mediation, offers the following important and essential benefits
Some matters should not be mediated: Conflict, incapacity, power imbalance. These should not be mediated without the appointment of an advocate for the weaker party.
When should mediation start? The sooner the better but it can be before or during the course of litigation.
Who should mediate? Elder mediators are specifically trained mediation after death matters and is the only type of mediator familiar with these matters and the applicable law.
Please contact us for more information on elder mediation and how it can help with your matter
Not all elder abuse, neglect or exploitation involves a matter you might read in the newspapers. It can be a result of caregiver burnout, misunderstanding or disagreement regarding finances or challenges posed by an elder’s incapacity such as safety issues.
For example: Can Mom be left at home while her son goes to work? When Mom moves in with the daughter can mom pay the bills? Can they build an addition to the house? Can a child be paid for transportation and time in caring for Dad?
For elder abuse, neglect or exploitation or the potential of disputes among family, mediation can be a better way to resolve these matters. It causes fewer hard feelings and may lead to a better understanding between parties and better care for the senior. Sitting down in mediation may be able to keep the family intact.
In cases where the elder has cognitive impairment or other limitations in his or her ability to fully understand and participate in decision-making, the mediator may require that an appropriate advocate for the elder be present for all conversations and participate in all decisions which would impact the senior.
Some cases are simply going to court due to the nature of elder abuse cases. It might involve significant, willful cases of neglect or abuse or other high conflict matters. Maybe it’s a particularly divisive case that has polarized a family and caused a lot of ill will. Or it might involve such disputed facts and understandings as to the situation that a judge or a jury has to decide it.
Before a guardianship matter is filed with the courts, legal experts will advise mediation instead. These processes are much less adversarial and may bring disputes to a close without the need for time consuming and expensive court battles and, of course, preserve the integrity of the family
Mediation on the other hand, can take as little as weeks to reach a decision. This is because they’re far less adversarial, allowing the parties to discuss their points of view in a more conducive environment. What’s more, any information divulged in a mediation is confidential and can’t be used as evidence in court, so participants feel less threatened when volunteering their thoughts, opinions, and arguments
Sets a Positive Tone – Court cases are often seen as a weapon against parties that have opinions or ideas that oppose your own. So individuals who choose to settle disputes in court rarely ever leave on good terms.Taking the legal dispute to court can seriously damage relationships, and may even have a toll on the emotional and mental well-being of the elder.
Although taking a guardianship dispute to court might be the first route on most people’s mind, alternatives like mediation can be much less costly, time consuming, and damaging. Understanding how all parties, including the elder can benefit from these arrangements can drastically affect the outcomes of a dispute, and may even result in positive conclusions that benefit everyone involved.
